Another beautiful weekend with a group of amazing women to remember an amazing woman! My friends Christy, Ashley, Anna and I rented a car and made the journey out to the Isle of Mull for the two year anniversary of the sad day my Mum passed away. Since my family and I scattered her ashes on Mull's Calgary Bay, I was so grateful to be there on June 12th.
Getting to the ferry on time was a bit hit and miss, as we got a text message from the ferry company 2 hours before our ferry departed saying the road we needed to take was closed because of a derailed train! The detour added an extra hour but we made it to the ferry just in time. Friday was a bit rainy and grey, but we made the best of it as always. Being back on Calgary Bay brought back a great deal of emotions but I was so happy to be there. The plan was to camp on the beach, but when we arrived we discovered it was a protected area. A cute camp site beside the beach was just as good though! We had to share with other people which changed my idea of the beach being a secluded place just for my Mum, but it is gorgeous- of course other people would want to enjoy it as well.
We went for a wonder along the shore line that afternoon, made a delicious dinner and a great fire. We befriended the two guys camping beside us who turned out to be divers and affectionately became know as Scuba Scott and Kiwi. However, their idea of fire making included a large container of petrol. We were not having that, so I proceeded to make a fabulous fire the proper way. They looked very sheepish for most of the evening, and I have to admit to feeling very proud of myself! Once it was completely dark, Anna provided great entertainment with her fire poy.
Saturday was the perfect day! I spent time on the beach in the morning taking in the sights, sounds and smell of the sea. We then walked out to the mouth of the bay. The sun was shining and it was glorious to be outside. What struck me the most on our walk was the amount of life that was around. Birds, insects, flowers, sheep, sea life was everywhere! It made me smile to know my Mum was part of it all.
Scuba Scott and Kiwi took us out on their boat to find basking sharks in the afternoon. Part of me was a bit hesitant to go off on a wild adventure with new people on this particular day, but then it occurred to me that it was perfect. Mum loved a good adventure, especially when the sea was involved! No sharks to be found, but it was very fun to see Mull from a different perspective. Later that day we met two other fabulous women. Carole, a 74 year old who was so excited to hear all about our journeys and Lily a 3 year old who was filled with such fire and charisma! These ladies reminded me of the fire, charisma and joy my mother had.
We had a delicious BBQ on the beach that night, drank red wine and enjoyed chocolate cake. Another tribute of course! I know the rest of my family would have loved to be there on the beach with us that night, so I decided to make sure they were there in spirit. Once it was dark, my friends and I launched a 100% biodegradable chinese lantern over the bay, each with a name written on. They were stunning and it felt like the perfect thing to do that evening.
On Sunday we packed up and said goodbye to Calgary Bay then headed to a wee restaurant for coffee that my family and I had visited 2 years ago. It was nice to be back. The ferry back to the mainland wasn't until 7 pm so we decided to let the wind take us where it would. We ended up at the last traditional cheese farm in the Hebrides which happened to have a gorgeous cafe just right for lunch. The rest of the afternoon was spent shopping in a little town called Tobermory and writing postcards while sitting by the harbor.
I can't believe 2 years has passed since my Mum left us and cannot believe how much my life has changed since then. But I am grateful to be living in Edinburgh with incredible friends and to have the opportunity to be free, live well and never forget.
I had a very powerful moment last night that I would like to share with everyone. A few friends and I went out for a few drinks and ended up at a very cool place at the end of Princes Street. Around 11 pm a band called "The Leads" from Manchester began to play. It was four young guys whose hair styles and general demeanor was a throw back to the sixties. They played mostly covers of danceable songs- you know, real crowd pleasers. The dance floor was packed with a motley selection of people, but mostly young women who confirmed that fashion styles from the past are still in full swing here. The club was dark and classy.
Just as the band started a cover of the Beatles song "I Want to Hold Your Hand" everyone just lost it with excitement, including me. People started screaming and crowding the stage. It was then that I was suddenly flooded with thoughts of my Mum as a teenager and the sense that she was there in the club. She was a massive fan of the Beatles and was one of the screaming girls that you always see in documentaries about the band. And here I was forty some years later, having the same reaction to the Beatles, just sung by a cover band! It makes me so happy to be in a sense walking in her shoes.
I also started to think about a story she told me many times when I was growing up. Her best friend Manuella's father owned a warehouse in Edinburgh. It had an empty basement that my Mum and Manuella decided to turn into a dance club. They spent ages painting and finding furniture and creating just the right atmosphere inside. Their club was a hit from the first weekend it opened. All their friends came and they brought their friends who brought their friends. Mum told me that they played a lot of Beatles music in that club and it was a great success. However the fun didn't last too long. A fire marshal caught wind of what was going on in that basement and closed it down due to not adhering to regulations. Mum and Manuella never thought of that! For those of you who experienced or heard about the dance floor and cow print in the basement of our house in Midnapore, you probably can understand why my Mum was so agreeable in letting my brother Ben transform it in the first place.
Two years since my Mum passed away is coming up on June 12 and I suspect I will have more and more moments like last night in the near future. I welcome them with open arms. It is so strange how random moments, songs and people can have such a powerful effect on memory and the ability to connect you to people who are no longer here. Thanks for joining in on the fun last night Mum!
So the taught portion of my program is coming to a quick end. One more paper and an end of the year celebration is all that is left. Of course, the big paper that really matters is still to come. Although my thesis research questions are not fully defined yet, I am interested in looking at the motivations and barriers that contribute or restrict individuals in making sustainable lifestyle choices. This will become clearer once I meet with my supervisor at the end of the month. Right now, I am feeling burnt out and despite some incredible adventures and good times, I am missing home. I am also acutely aware that this next chapter will not be easy. Part of me welcomes it and another part is absolutely terrified. What have I got myself into!?
The significance of all this is not lost on me though. I stop myself now and then as I’m walking down a street to remind myself where I am and what it is I am doing. I am in Edinburgh, living out my dream of completing an MSc, which I will be proud of completing for the rest of my life. I am no longer a tourist, but a resident who has a favourite coffee shop and one who can give tourists directions. I visit with my Grandma weekly and have become good friends with my cousins. My family is proud of me and I know the essence of my Mum sits on my shoulder cheering me on when things get tough. These things are invaluable to me and are what I need to remember when I am feeling homesick and uneasy about writing a thesis. I am full of gratitude for what has been and what lies ahead. Bring it on Edinburgh!
We got back to Edinburgh from Glen Strae on Saturday the 15th, then a bunch of us went to Dunbar to celebrate Anna's birthday the following day. We stopped in town to get some provisions for the day then walked to White Sands beach. The weather was a bit sketchy in the morning but eventually came out and so did the BBQ! We had a super fun day galavanting on beach, playing games, swimming, eating delicious food and listening to music. We did have to retreat to higher ground as the tide came in, but the grassy knoll we inhabited was a great location for a game of rounders. This game is like baseball, however at some point it became more like rugby. Many bruises and lots of laughs! We slowly made our way back to the train as the sun went down. A day on the beach in the sun. Sweet!! Happy Birthday Anna!
Photo credit: Thanks Anna and Christy for some stellar photos!
After two days after returning from Rum, and just enough time to wash and line dry our clothes, bags were packed up once again for a week of camping in Glen Strae, which is close to the west coast town of Oban. This course, poorly titled Land Based Competency, (a shared disagreement exists among my peers regarding the implication of a certain incompetence in our ability!) was part of the professional development content of the course. The lack of assignment or grading for this course lent itself to an overall sense of being on holiday with good friends! Sam, a Phd student at the University, who runs his own Placed-based education business and was happy to lead our week.
The first two days were spent again exploring ways in which we as educators can help people know and connect with a particular place. This involved activity after activity translating folklore, history, science and environmental issues. My favorite part was standing at the Great Glen Fault where the land masses that make up England and Scotland collided millions of years ago, closing the Iapetus Sea! We then hiked up further into the glen to camp for the next 2 nights. On the way, we encountered mommy highland coos and their sweet fuzzy babies that look like little teddy bears! We all took pictures of them that I’m pretty sure resemble many postcards sold in the high street. A close encounter with a highland coo (cow, for those of you who don’t know what I am talking about!) ticks another box in my Scotland experience!
An interesting element of the week in Glen Strae was doing my very first solo, which essentially meant sitting on my own in a secluded natural place for about 6 hours. The idea is to justbe in a place, with nature as the only distraction. Some people may see this type of experience as a slow form of torture. I however, found it a rather refreshing break from the constant companionship of my colleagues I had during the previous two weeks. I found a glorious spot on the meandering river with inviting swimming holes and a bank of trees. It was a perfect spot for my 6 hours rendezvous with nature.
Unfortunately, our solo’s happened to be scheduled on the day that heavy dark clouds rolled in and rain gushed from the sky! The irony of this is that I spent the majority of my 6 hours attempting to connect with nature curled up in a bivi bag, which is essentially a glorified orange garbage bag. Waterproof clothes would hold up for about 30 minutes in that kind of rain and with 2 full days of camping left I could not afford to let all my layers get soaking wet. So I listened to rain pelt the plastic sheet covering my head, the wind rustle leaves and a cuckoo bird taunt me with its obnoxious call. What a strange thing it must be for a bird to see a human in a bag. Somewhere along the way I lost all sense of time. Some people who advocate solos say this is what is suppose to happen. But I think I may have had a small lapse of sanity. About half way through the solo I recall laughing in a maniac manner at the ridiculousness of me lying in an orange garbage bag beside this beautiful river trying to connect with nature through the veil of orange plastic.
Through the torrents of rain, I eventually spotted the red thermorest going up in a tree off in the far distance. This was the signal to come back to camp. I scooped up my plastic home, fired the cuckoo a questionable hand gesture and scuttled back. I am still computing how I feel about my solo. Experiencing nature through orange plastic with a temporary loss of sanity and sense of time is not exactly my idea of a good time. But I have to say that I really enjoy my own company and my own thoughts (as loopy as they may be!), which brings me a great deal of comfort.
It was absolutely miserable outside for the rest of the evening once we returned to camp, but we were all quite happy with our cozy community living in the tipi, sitting around the campfire, listening to Sam play the flute and telling stories of our day. It was a nice reminder how life must have been before TV's and other distractions. It was so rejuvenating and I couldn't help but wonder why we only allow ourselves this form of living when we are camping? Overall the day was a great success. Did I connect with nature in that spot beside the river? Questionable. Will I forever remember my solo day in Glen Strae? Absolutely!
We finished up the week with a very cold plunge into a swimming hole created by a gorgeous waterfall, which had doubled in volume since we had passed it 2 days previous. The five seconds of submersion in that freezing pool was enough to wash away 5 days of camping funk that tends to build up with no shower, a permanent thermal layer beside your skin and co-inhabiting in a tent with 3 other people. We celebrated our final course together with hot food and lots of locally brewed beer at a pub twenty minutes from camp. Everyone was toasty that final night in our sleeping bags!! Interpret this as you will.
Here is a short video I took the very rainy night after our solos. Make sure you have your speakers turned on so you can hear the rain, Sam playing the flute in the tipi and the Highland coos in the distance!
Thanks to Anna and Christy for a few great photos on this page!
The emergence of spring increased my enthusiasm for a new adventure! It was perfect timing for our Ecology Field Study course on the Isle of Rum, which is in the Inner Hebrides. The island is National Nature Reserve and internationally recognised and protected for it’s unique features. We stayed in the island hostel, located in what were the servants quarters in Kinloch castle (yup that’s right, a castle!) built in 1897 by George Bullough. For such a smart guy (so we were told), George sure made a few poor decisions. For example, he wanted a pink castle (a questionable fact in itself!), so sandstone was used to build it. An incredibly porous rock in one of the wettest places in the UK….hmm! Needless to say, the castle is now falling apart.
Our tour of the inside of the castle, which is exactly the way George's wife Lady Monica left it before selling it to the Nature Conservancy, shows his excessive nature and might I say horribly tacky decorating style! He would entertain his rich friends frequently and was dedicated to giving his guests the best experience. Perhaps this explains why a book a book about Rum describes the ballroom as the orgy room! To give the guy some credit though, he did install hydropower on the mountain side, which to this day provides the 30 permanent residents and the castle with most of its power. That is pretty impressive!
Upon first glance of the week’s schedule, the course resembled ecology boot camp. We definitely were on the go the whole time, but what an incredible experience! Everyday involved hiking around the island to do some sort of study, from bird surveys and bog plants, (Ashley fell waist deep in this bog aswell!) to fresh and salt-water invertebrates. We discussed the unique qualities and adaptations species have to live on the small island while examining them under microscopes and exploring their relevance in terms of ecosystems. All the while, we covered how we as educators can help connect people with the incredible processes that make the planet function. Human history of the island and relevant stages of Scottish history that made Rum what it is today was explored while sitting in the ruins of a black house where families actually lived. Learning this way had the power to transform what some may see as boring history into a fascinating and moving experience. This is authentic education!
On day 4, we hiked up Hallival, a mountain that sits at about 2800 feet above sea level. This task had been on all our minds since we arrived on the island, as Hallival could be seen from everywhere and it did not look like a walk in the park! Just as we convened outside the castle for this highly anticipated adventure, ready with compasses, maps and packs full of extra clothes, a girl staying in the hostel sauntered up to Pete my professor and asked if she could join us. Under an uncontrolled and astonished laugh, he pointed out that her attire of Ugg boots (glorified slippers), skirt and purse were not appropriate to climb this mountain. Upon insisting, “she was used to hiking this way” Pete said he could not stop her from follow our route up the mountain, but he was not taking any responsibility for her safety.This encounter was a big reality check for all of us about the safety, legal, and professional practice issues that occur for teachers in the outdoors.
At 9 pm as the sun went down, we began our ascent. Now you may think hiking to the top of a mountain at night is crazy, but there was logic to the madness. One goal was to get to the top without using our headlights. Our eyes just adjusted to the slow decrease of light and it was shockingly easy, and I might add very empowering, to get to the top this way! This also gave us time to practice night navigation. However, the headlight of our friend in Uggs could occasionally be seen scrambling over rocks about 100 meters below us. She affectionately became know as Gollum from Lord of the Rings. Somewhere between 1000 and 1500 feet, we stopped seeing her light (no worries though, we did see her in the hostel the next day!).
Another reason for hiking at night was to witness birds that are active after sundown. About 25% of the worlds population of Manx Shearwater seabirds convene on the peak every night due to the unique geology. Just as we began to feel like we were the only souls around for miles, the noises began. Slowly a bird orchestra developed. We could only make out the faint silhouettes of the birds flying around our heads and around our feet. The air was moving around us. Occasionally, a birdcall right at our feet would signal we should stop walking. Fat and happy birds just sat on the ground protecting their burrows/ nests in the soft rock and soil. We all sat in silence in the dark for sometime, feeling very humbled and lucky to experience another species world. Aurora Borealis lite up the sky before we headed down the mountain. Getting to bed at 3:30 am never felt better!
A happy Manx Shearwater- although perhaps not so happy about the flash!
The following day was spent in Kilmory, on the north part of the island, discussing the Red deer population that have been heavily studied. Ever heard of carnivorous deer? Then meet the Rum deer. They eat each other’s antlers and bones and eat our beloved Manx Shearwaters! The theory is there is not enough calcium in the soil on the island due to massive human influences, so they adapted. But the population is very weak. The fact that the researchers hoard the skulls and antlers in a shed may have something to do with this! This blows my mind!
But where there are deer, there are also ticks. The tick I discovered on my leg that night also blew my mind. My first tick experience would not have been so dramatic, if I hadn’t looked at one under a high-powered microscope the day before! All I could think about was its nasty little head under my skin enjoying a feast. Gross.
The day before we left the island was our only free day, and a few of us really wanted to see as much of the island as possible. So instead of a relaxing day swimming in the sea, we went for a 17 mile hike! We left the hostel at 7:30am and reached Bloodstone hill on the west side of the island by 11:00am. We then made our own path towards Harris on the south west side where George, his wife Lady Monica and George’s father John are buried. On the way we spotted, highland cows, goats, Red deer and a Golden Eagle. The sun was shining and it was a great day. Although I think Ashley had a different opinion after she fell in to yet another bog!
I was pretty sure my legs were going to fall off on the last 2 miles back to the castle. But the sense of satisfaction and accomplishment as we sat down for dinner with friends and our teacher that night was immeasurable. Saying goodbye to Rum was difficult. I didn’t think it was possible to become so connected to a place in such a short time. I suppose when you know and understand the ecosystem, history, geology, folklore and the people who rely on the landscape a place has much more meaning and you become invested in the future of the place. This, of course, will be the point of what we do.
Here is a short video of the Orchestrium inside the castle playing a tune. It was made to resemble a 30 piece orchestra. I can't figure out how to turn the video upright so I'm afraid you will just have to watch and listen sideways. Sorry!
Thanks to Christy, Anna and Ashley for taking a few awesome shots used on this page!
The end of March and all of April was a challenging time for me. I had two major assignments to complete as well as my thesis proposal, all due within about 3 weeks of each other. For about 5 weeks I woke up, ate breakfast, and then read what seemed like an endless list of journal articles and wrote paragraph after paragraph. Most days I would stop around 8 or 9 pm then manage a mind numbing activity like watching the telly before falling asleep and doing it all over again the following day. I started to dream about my assignments and felt guilty in my sleep because I was not writing. I found that one paper made me question everything I thought I knew about the world and my place within it, which resulted in my first and very profound existential dilemma! It was by far the most awful writing experience. It is a horrible feeling when you can’t string two thoughts together in a coherent manner and the more you look at a piece of writing in an attempt to improve it the less confident you become. My confidence in my writing ability definitely took a hit and I am not sure it has fully recovered. Needless to say, I could not have been happier or more relieved to finally hand it all in. Every ounce of creativity and will to write was put towards my assignments! I miss writing for fun.
It was only about 3 weeks ago, that mass hibernation ceased and the general zombie like appearance of Edinburgh residents began to dissipate. The sun made a few appearances, the rain ceased and days became longer. I finally started to feel like I could recover from mental battery and exhaustion, physical lethargy and a general spiritual recession. Simply said, the Scottish winter was long, dark and cold and I would take a Calgary winter over this any day!
The development of a few great friendships with three girls in my program has really made this semester enjoyable! Anna from England, Ashley from Washington State and Christy from Michigan are some of the most entertaining women I have ever met. Although there are no official breaks in this program the four of us decided to take a short holiday in March to Anna’s parents house in Yorkshire. We had heard about the gorgeous farmhouse and the delicious home cooked food for months, but nothing could prepare us for the spa-like 5 days that occurred! In order to justify the culinary delights, we did ALOT of walking! One day was spent at Hebden Bridge and another exploring Bolton Abbey before watching Anna's Mum perform in the community Orchestra!
But favourite day was a 6-hour hike through the moors of Bronte country. I’m sure everyone can picture the atmospheric, rainy, gloomy setting that inspired the Bronte sisters’ writing. After about half an hour of walking, I was soaking wet (drookit as the Scots would say!) with about 3 inches of water sloshing around in my boots. But it all makes so much sense now! I would be dark and disturbed like the Bronte sisters if I had to do that in a corset and a petty coat everyday! A few follies from this hike worth mentioning include an impromptu river crossing- runoff from obscene amounts of rain and nearly loosing Ashley in a bog.
Our return from these hikes were met with freshly baked scones with clotted cream and jam or a cheese board that made me think I had died and gone to heaven. Anna’s dad, the director of the Yorkshire Slow Foods, prepared delicious gourmet meals every night made from local and organic food, including fresh eggs from the farm that we collected! In an attempt to thank them for their hospitality, the four of us made dinner the last night we were there. The homemade pasta made with a press definitely brought our lasagne up to a delicious slow food standard! Yummy!!
Our holiday ended with half a day in York, which I think is one of the coolest cities I have ever visited.
